I am not your maid, I am not your servant

Marriage and family. They look so great from the outside but what is really going on?

You meet someone and fall in love. Now let's be honest those first few dating months we only see what we want to see. We get married and we see...all of it. The clothes that just didn't make it to the hamper, the crumbs left on the counter, the overwhelming amount of crap we collect and shove in a drawer. The first year is spent dealing with it; either you don't say anything and silently cringe or just pick it up, clean it up or throw it away. After a while we finally say something to our spouse. Things get a little better for a little while and then you have children. You swear you are not going to be one of those parents that have a messy home because you have a new baby and babies sleep and you will have time to keep your house clean.

Now, when your child is born this is easy because you have an abundance amount of family in your home all of the time, ALL OF THE TIME. People will start to go back to their normal lives and you do okay at first. Then one day you look up, tired from no sleep for a month, and you find yourself living in a home that you said you never would. You are too tired to care and wish for the days of just crumbs on the counter but you have a beautiful baby so you live with it.

When things calm down and they sleep through the night you start to get a grip on your life. Ahhhh, now it's back to somewhat normal...then they turn 2. Now they are pretty helpful (when they want to be) and they help pick stuff up (if they want to play with it) but the day you reach between the couch cushions and discover a rotten piece of apple you know just how much help that little bundle of joy isn't.

As your child(ren) get older things are a bit easier if you started them early. You now have little maids living with you and all you have to do is feed them, clothe them and occasionally drive them somewhere....then they turn 12. I am convinced that 12 year old children are to pay you back for every wrong doing you have ever done (including the time you were two).

Now their teenage years are a blur but you will remember telling them, as you told your spouse, "I am not your maid, I am not your servant" many, many, many times. Occasionally, "I'm not your taxi and I'm not your ATM" are mixed into your conversations...just to spice things up.

Graduation day...Now as much as your life began with your bundle of joy 18 years ago this is really your graduation day. Your spouse is too tired to make any messes any more, your bundle of joy that, even though you reminded them you were not their maid you were, your house will now be yours once again.

Your child(ren) have grown up. They are off living their lives so now comes the time that we all upgrade our homes. We clean out their rooms, not get rid of it just make it nice. We change our floors, our kitchens, we take trips...ahh the money we have that we never did when that bundle of joy lived with us. Instead of picking up after anyone we now have someone who comes in and cleans twice a week. We will never be a servant again! Hang on to that thought the cat wants out.

Okay, I am needing to wrap this up because it's almost time to feed the dogs but a few more thoughts, where was I? Oh ya, we will never be a servant again! Really? The cat wants in now, grab a cup of coffee I'll be right back.

Your bundle of joy has a bundle of joy. Even though we are older it's so much easier because we just have to play but when did little ones get so smart? I don't remember their parents being this smart or maybe I was smarter then.

Now the messes don't seem to be such a problem to pick up. Now "I am not your maid or I am not your servant" isn't part of my vocabulary because those messes mean they are having fun. So with grandchildren you are not a servant...it's just part of enjoying their lives. I am not your maid, I am not your servant ever again...ahhh life is great.

I better end this now because the dogs are hungry and the damn cat wants out again.